The Impossible Nazi

Yes, yes, I know. I said I wouldn’t read more in this series until I’d hit some nonfiction first — but the last book ended with the Dome of the Rock being blown up! How could I resist? The Impossible Nazi takes us further into truly alternative history, as there’s increasingly little about this 1942 that we’d recognize. At the moment most of the fighting is between Dai Nippon and the United States, and even that’s minimal: both sides lost the majority of their carrier fleets, and the US is buying German unterseebooten to prey on Jap shipping lanes. The English have lost all of Africa and have written off Australia for the time being, and yet Churchill persists in maintaining a state of war with Germany and exchanging air raids with Berlin. Both the American president, Henry Wallace, and the German chancellor Schloss are befuddled: why won’t the old man just write off France and Poland, and join forces with his American brothers to strike back against the Rising Sun? The events of Impossible Nazi, though, will shake things up multiple times.

Impossible strikes me as a transition novel, because while some major things happen, they don’t happen until the end of the story. For the most part, Herr Schloss — in his capacity as the German chancellor — is fending off attempts at assassinations from reactionary Nazis who resent his change of policies. This series is now poorly titled, in fact, because the Fuhrercouncil consists of almost entirely non-Nazis: they’re technically members of the party, sure, but Himmler and Hess are dead, von Ribbentrop has been shifted to making commercial treaties, and Goering is increasingly sidelined. The policy of Schloss’s Germany is no longer recognizable as Nazi, either: after inexplicably appearing in 1941 Germany in command of the Nazi party in the wake of Hitler’s death, Schloss has completely changed history to prevent Germany’s degradation and ruin. As mentioned in the first book, he is no moralist who wants to suddenly turn Germany into some comfortable democracy in Europe notable for its pretzels and lager: he’s more in the mark of Otto von Bismarck. He wants Germany to be the great power on the continent, so formidable that no one will mess with it. To that end, he has turned the Amis from near-enemies into near-friends; he has avoided war with Russia and is waiting for Stalin’s paranoia and the inherent stupidity of command economics to drag it down; and he has turned into The Friend of the Jews, facilitating the creation of the State of Judea. Here, his greatest enemy is not the English air force, Stalin, or even the Munich Nasties: it’s an increasingly desperate Winston Churchhill, who throws the dice and plunges both the United States and the United Kingdom into constitutional crises.

As my pace indicates, I’m enjoying this series very much — not only because Schloss is an interesting character, and not only because of the more inexplicable elements like the mysterious housekeeper who seems to know that Schloss is a man out of time. There are other ‘differences’ in the timeline, like Queen Margaret reining instead of George or Elizabeth (they were both killed in a bombing raid before the series even began), and the reader is as surprised to encounter these as Schloss is. It’s a lot less dangerous for us, though, because when he makes a misstep it feeds some rumors that he’s been replaced by the English, somehow, or has been sent by the gods as punishment for betraying Hitler’s vision. There are also amusing perversities happening, like the US Navy sailing U-boats, the Luftwaffe kitting itself out with B-17s, and so on. (The B-17 has a sadly shortened life in this universe: since there’s no Eighth Air Force constantly bombing Festung Europa from Britain, and B-17s don’t have any actionable range in a Pacific controlled by the Japs, only 500 were produced.) As with the other books, this one ends with a twisty hook — but one I will do my best to ignore for the present.

Highlights:

“Do you ever lie, Harry?” The senator stared at the president. “Mr. President, lying is a diplomatic tool that becomes quickly dulled from use. It is best exercised as little as possible.”

The difficult we can accomplish immediately. The impossible takes a bit longer.

“Have you thought we might have children, Darling?” she asked.
“We have talked about it,” he replied. “But, I have a lot on my schedule this morning.”

“Please, Your Majesty,” Attlee said. “We are civilized people. There are ways we can murder one another without bloodshed.”

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The Improbable Nazi

Ach du lieber but this is not a good cover.

In The Accidental Nazi, a historian from 1981 West Berlin was astonished to find himself inexplicably standing on a tarmac in 1941 Berlin, watching a plane carrying Adolf Hitler plow into the pavement and completely reroll the dice on Germany’s future. He was himself, and yet not himself: Heinrich Schloss in 1941 Germany was the leader of the Nazi Party, now a member of the small fuhrercouncil responsible for leading Germany until a new fuhrer could be appointed. Schloss, though confused, was desperate to prevent both Operation Barbarossa and the Holocaust — and after months of political maneuvering, the reckless Hess finally set events into motion that saw both himself and Himmler dead. Schloss was hailed as the new king of town, master of a Germany whose future he cannot quite predict. Reactionary forces within Germany want him gone and the tenants of Nazism restored, and the world scene is utterly unpredictable. But Schloss is a man on a mission: to machen Sie Deutscherland großartig again!

This second book in the series takes us into utter terra incognita, foreign-policy wise. At this point, mild spoilers for the first book will follow, so proceed at your literary peril, meine Damen und Herren. Schloss was largely successful in meeting his goals in the first book, largely because his background as an historian makes him extremely familiar with the characters and technology of the day. He was able to exploit his knowledge of late war technical improvements, in fact, to increase his bona fides with a lot of military figures who were impressed by how much he knew about the jet-engine proposals and the next-gen u-boat concepts. Schloss is also good at manipulating people. Now, however, things are changing to such a degree that he can no longer lead his targets: he must take events as they come. And…boy, do they come, with repeated attempts on his life by one Reynard Heidrich. Because of the events of the first novel. Heidrich was busy elsewhere on the night he would have been shot by Czechs; now he is the standard-bearer for the hardline Nazis who attracts those who point out that “Hey, our whole Nazi thing is about attacking the Jews, and now we’re giving them free transport to the middle east?” Geopolitically, things are also very messy: Japan launched a much more potent Pearl Harbor assault this time, and has apparently succeeded in not only taking Hawaii but threatening Australia. Most of Australia’s troops are in Africa, fighting a losing war against the Germans who control the entirety of the med. Despite this, he refuses to bow out, even though the Germans point out that they could help his armies exit Africa with guns and men intact. Honor must be satisfied, apparently. Other events are going on: Franklin Roosevelt dies of natural causes in Warm Springs, being replaced by Henry Wallace, and explosions disable the Panama Canal.

I tend to focus on the military and political scene, but there’s also character work. When Schloss found himself in 1941 Germany, he also found himself in possession of a family — children, a sister and brother-in-law, and a red-headed girlfriend whose cunning is as remarkable as her beauty. (Heinlein lives!) There is also a curious houseskeeper who knows far more than she should — she knows without being told that Schloss comes from a world where the hammer-and-sickle of the bolshies once flew over a ruined Berlin, and that Russian boots once tread on German necks. Schloss’s bonds with these characters, particular his brother-in-law who rises to join the fuhrercouncil, seem real. While some events of the novel seem improbable — the Japanese running wild in the Pacific — and I’m still wondering WHERE IS CHINA in all this. Are the Japanese so empowered because they don’t have men tied down there? The book creates an interesting Middle East plot thread, which leads to an EXPLOSIVE twist at the end and urges me to continue in the series. I must resist until nonfiction has triumphed over novels, though.

Highlights:

“I wouldn’t hold my breath, Karl. Anoxia is an unpleasant way to die.”

“I do not consider myself to be ruthless,” he said. “It’s just that I have learned that it does no one any good when you postpone decisions. The problems simply fester. It is sometimes painful to make decisions, but if you don’t, then you have to endure the ongoing pain.”

“You know,” he said, “sometimes I wished I smoked. Then I could busy myself with pulling out a cigarette and lighting it as I studied the scenery. Then I could think of something to say. You have left me speechless.” (I use a coffee mug for the same thing.)

“How have you managed not to have someone punch you out on the Senate floor?”
“The Senate is a civilized place, Mr. President. My opponents have merely threatened to punch me out.”

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The Accidental Nazi

Can you imagine the Russians marching through Berlin? And the Americans and the British in the Ruhr? It would be the end of everything.” “It almost seems as though you can see the future,” she said. “Do you think you can change it?”

On a visit to the airport, Heinrich Schloss has inexplicably found himself there in 1941,   watching an airplane plow into the tarmac. Its passenger, Adolf Hitler, is now dead – and history will change.    Schloss has no idea why he has transported back in time forty years,   and he’s dumbfounded to find himself as the Parteileider, a position that in his memory was held by Martin Bormann. Evidently his alter-ego, this other Heinrich Schloss, shot  Bormann and assumed his position.   Schloss, who grew up in a West Berlin dominated by the threat of Soviet violence,  knows two things: one, he needs to exploit his inexplicable arrival in this time and in this seat of power to prevent the Russians from invading Germany – and two, he needs to stop the Final Solution.  Although the premise is a bit sketchy (we get a prologue in which scientists five centuries ahead of us do something and then go “…oh, that’s going to do some weird stuff in the multiverse”),  the execution is surprisingly good.  

Although Schloss has no idea how he got here, and he’s equally mystified and creeped out by the fact that the man he replaced was some instance of himself – same voice,  face, handwriting –   but has two advantages in using the position to pursue his primary goal of saving Germany from a hubristic attack on Russia. One, he was a teacher of German history with a specialty in World War 2, presumably in the area of vergangenheitsbewältigung, or reckoning with Germany’s Nazi past. Two, he’s good at parsing personalities and manipulating people, and he takes some pleasure in the act of doing so. When he’s suddenly made part of a small group of men who are responsible for navigating the Reich through these waters, those two skills combine nicely.  He quickly emerges as one of the two power players at the table, and even as the fuhrer-council navigates through 1941 – considering Barbarossa,   the air war against the Englanders, and keeping the Amis from wading further into the war –   Schloss and Himmler are slowly maneuvering for the big seat.  This is Highlander politics, though: in the end, there can only be one. 

Character-wise, this novel is all kinds of interesting,  in large part because Schloss is not the moralist readers are expecting, Yes, he does want to avoid the Final Solution, but his first priority is keeping Germany from HItler’s midwar mistakes that saw the Fatherland broken up and occupied by foreign powers. He is a German patriot, someone who wants to magnify its power even while scaling back the things that made Nazi Germany a reprehensible polity like mass murder and the police state.  He wants Germany, not Russia, to dominate the continent, and he’s willing to take risks like annoying Himmler to do it. There’s a subtle complication, too: the “alter-Schloss”, the counterpart he appears to have replaced,  is seemingly present within Schloss himself. He has the man’s ease with a Walther PPK, for instance, and some places and people seem familiar in a way he can’t explain. And then there’s the ambition, ambition that led alter-Schloss to murder Boremann and accuse the man of treachery. Are Schloss’s own desires to lead Germany into a greater future for itself his own – or are they alter-Schloss’s, now being moderated through Schloss’s own morality?     

Connectedly,  Wagher succeeds in creating a character-driven novel wherein most of the supporting characters are the Nasties themselves!  We spend a lot of time seeing Schloss talk and argue with  Goering,  Himmler, Hess, Ribbontrop, and (to a much lesser degree) Goebbels.  This extensive characterization muddies things for the reader. Not for a moment do we forget that they’re Nazis, of course, but when seen through Schloss’s eyes – as he evaluates their usability and their weaknesses–  we see them as human villains rather than just the baddies. They are human not in the sense that Wagher is redeeming them, but in the sense that we’re getting a clearer view of their foibles and their interior drama. (The exception is Himmler, who is consistently antagonistic and often leaves meetings in a Huff.)  Goering, for instance, is all kinds of awful –  a thief, a glutton, and a morphine addict– but  he becomes a key ally for Schloss. Hess, too, despite being somewhat erratic, proves to be excellent at giving speeches and spends most of the book being the figurehead for the council in a way that reminded me of Malenkov in The Death of Stalin

As alt-history goes, this was really fun. Things are getting quite different but in believable ways, and the more they drift from our history’s course,  the harder it is for Schloss to predict what to do:  by the end he’s more dependent on his own instincts as a leader and his history with these men.  The geopolitical situation gets lively, too, and I’ve already started the second novel where Herr Schloss is steaming into the complete unknown.  There are other elements I appreciated, like a good sprinkling of German expressions for flavor, and for Schloss’s dark, sarcastic humor – what Phillip Kerr called the Berliner Schnauze.  I was not expecting this to be as good as it was, given the self-published nature of the cover.


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Scary things & WWW Wednesday

Today’s Long and Short review is….”Things that Scare Me”. Swarm insects that sting/bite, obviously. Falling off bridges into deep water. The increasing dystopia of the 21st century, as technology further destroys our ability to be human and AI begins destroying our ability to act like sentient creatures. themselves. The prospect of having a stroke and being a prisoner in my own body. Also, the white cougar level in Red Dead Redemption 2 still gives me the heebie-jeebies even though I’ve played the game through more times than I can remember. The player enters a dark cave where mauled bodies show up periodically, the player hears his partner get attacked, and as he gets deeper and deeper into the cave he can hear the thing growling and pacing WAITING and COUGARS ARE SCARY ENOUGH IN BROAD DAYLIGHT! There’s just that flash of white, and if you don’t go into deadeye fast enough to shoot it, you’re going to die and get to be terrorized again. Seriously, in 25+ years of gaming that cougar mission creeps me out like nothing else.

WHAT have you finished reading recently? The Normans: From Raiders to Kings, Lars Brownworth.

WHAT are you reading now? Still working on finishing Against the Machine (80+ highlights to date), and I started nosing into biographies of both Grover Cleveland and Otto von Bismarck. Clearly, I’m in a “Known for their Mustaches” mood.

Comedian/storyteller Adam Booth, Charlie “The Tin Man” Lucas, two musicians, and the current president of Arts Revive

WHAT are you reading next? I should focus on Devil in the White City: not only is it a library loan, but it seems like it would be good for Halloween week, what with the murder and such. However, Kingsnorth is making me want to read Brave New World again. However, I’m also planning on re-reading 13 Alabama Ghosts and Jeffrey, a small collection of Alabama ghost stories — inspired by both the season and the fact that I recently enjoyed the 44th Annual Tale-Telling Festival in Selma, an event inspired — and originally led by — Kathryn Tucker Windham, a journalist, folklorist, and storyteller who settled in Selma.

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Teaser Tuesday

In my lifetime, in my part of the world, the notion and meaning of ‘home’ has steadily crumbled under this external pressure until it is little more than a word. In a Machine anticulture, the home is a dormitory, probably owned by a landlord or a bank, in which two or more people of varying ages and degrees of biological relationship sleep when they’re not out being employed by a corporation, or educated by the state in preparation for being employed by a corporation. The home’s needs are met through pushing buttons, swiping screens or buying-in everything from food to furniture; for who has time for anything else, or has been taught the skills to do otherwise? Phones long ago replaced hearth fires. Handily, a phone, unlike a fire, can be kept under the pillow in case something urgent happens elsewhere while we sleep. We wouldn’t want to miss anything.

Paul Kingsnorth, Against the Machine.

Today’s Top Ten topic is….cozy reads. Well, alrighty then!

(1) The Awakening of Miss Prim. A young woman accepts a position in a strange little village that time and modernity have appeared to have forgotten. It’s a philosophical novel, but not in the Brothers Karamazov read-it-three-times and suddenly your life is irrevocably changed sense. It’s more of “…I never thought about that before.”

You say you’re looking for beauty, but this isn’t the way to achieve it, my dear friend. You won’t find it while you look to yourself, as if everything revolved around you. Don’t you see? It’s exactly the other way around, precisely the other way around. You mustn’t be careful, you must get hurt. What I am trying to explain, child, is that unless you allow the beauty you seek to hurt you, to break you and knock you down, you’ll never find it.”

(2) What You are Looking for Is in the Library. This one borders on the edge of magical realism because a librarian’s uncanny ability to find a book, and an object, that will change a person’s life. The plot is simple: in each story, a person in distress finds themselves in a community center’s library, in search of a book. When they tell the librarian what they want, however, they receive something different: what they need. I’m hoping more of this author’s work goes into English translation.

(3) The Invisible Heart:An Economic Romance. Boy meets girl, they fall in love. Problem is….he’s a classically liberal economist and she’s a modern liberal English teacher. Arguing over politics seems an improbable way to build a romance, though it’s worked for me in many of my friendships. Anyhoo, this is a sweet story full of discussion. Its author, Russ Roberts. hosts a weekly show called EconTalk which these days is more about human flourishing. Unfortunately, its audio quality suffered after he moved to Israel and had to do phone interviews only, but the dear man offers transcripts for free. Reading a conversation is nothing near the same as sitting and listening to two intelligent, urbane people hashing out an issue, but it’s not nothing. Speaking of…

(4) The Black Widowers series. Six men meet at a dinner club every month, taking turns to host and bring a guest. The guest, invariably, brings a mystery. The six professionals then try to logic their way through the puzzle, applying their reason along with their knowledge of history, literature, geography, etc. The mystery is always solvable by the reader, with the possible exceptions of “The Acquisitive Chuckle” and “The Obvious Factor”. When I eat at home, these are go-to companions.

(5) Possibly my strangest entry, The Kunstlercast: Conversations with James Howard Kunstler on the Comic Tragedy of Suburban Sprawl. I find this “cozy”, I suppose, because there’s a huge amount of nostalgia for me. Listening to Kunstler lecture at my university back in ’08 or ’09 was a life-changing experience for me, making me understand why I found old American cities fascinating and modern development so ugly and depression. These are transcripts of conversations between Jim and his friend Duncan Crary, who at the time I knew from another podcast, on some issue related to urbanism and its relationship with human flourishing.

(6) Anything by Rachel Joyce. I stumbled into her last year and fell head over heels with her stories, all of which are about human connection.

(7) Most anything by PG Wodehouse. I say most anything because he wrote an awful lot, and I’ve only explored his Jeeves and Wooster stories for the most part.

(8) Old Star Trek novels I’ve re-read so many times that the covers are worn off and I know most of the dialogue and sometimes confuse scenes in books for scenes in the actual shows.

(9) Before the Coffee Gets Cold. This is Japanese magical realism about a coffee shop with a twist: one chair in this shop can transport you to a moment in time in the coffee shop. That doesn’t seem like much, especially since the past can’t be changed, but sometimes the past can change us. I’m amazed by the fact that the author is able to get so many stories from the same basic premise.

(10) Anything by Wendell Berry, whether that be his Port William novels or his essays. I’ve even read his poetry and memorized one, “The Peace of Wild Things”.

When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.


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From Raiders to Kings

“Remove justice, and what are kingdoms but great robberies? For what are robberies themselves, but little kingdoms?”
~ St Augustine

I can still remember being scandalized in seventh grade when I opened the next chapter in our western civ text to discover we would be studying THE CONQUEST OF ENGLAND. England, conquered? At that age, for whatever reason, I had a notion of England as an impregnable island fortress: from that time on I regarded the Normans with enmity. Recently, though, I found myself in possession of a generous gift card and a desire to find out just what those Normans got up to outside of England. As a regular reader of medieval European history, I’m always stumbling upon them getting up to mischief, and figured a survey would be helpful. Given Lars Brownworth’s adjacent research into the Byzantines, Rome, and the Crusades, From Raiders to Kings is not only a very readable survey, but one that brings in useful context without getting long-winded.

The story of the Normans begins, of course, with the story of the Vikings — aggressive Norse and Danish raiders who savaged Britain, France, and other parts of Europe while also vigorously exploring across the Atlantic and into what we now call Russia. Viking predations caused the coasts of France to depopulate themselves, as people moved away from areas of easy access to the raiders; when the Franks decided to bribe the Norsemen with land, sea-facing Normandie around Rouen seemed an obvious place. There the Northmen in Frankland — the Normans — slowly began slipping into respectability. After first following the French Normans and their eventual attack on Britain — where other Vikings had also been attacking, leading to poor Harold Godwinson having to fight attacks back to back in different areas of the country — Brownsworth moves to the arguably more interesting Sicilian Normans. The Norman arrival in Sicily was amusingly mercenary; they were at first hired to fight one side, then switched the other when geld proved shiner and more numerous there; eventually they began a conquest of Sicily. The Med was…..complicated back then, and most of the book focuses on the constant political wrangling that goes on between the Norman powers, the Eastern Empire, saracens of various sorts, the Papal States, and other European powers. Because of the focus on the Sicilian Normans, my animosity toward the conquerors of Anglo-Saxon Britain was quickly put aside in the very entertaining history of the Normans in the Med. One chapter is called “William the Bad”, followed by “William the Worse”: What’s more, even while the Normans frequently shifted allegiances over the years — especially where the Eastern Empire was concerned, since Constantinople could be both patron and arch-rival — they also fought against misplaced enemies like Anglo-Saxons in the Varangian guard. Englander displaced by the arrival of zis people with outrageous accents were delighted to be able to seek vengeance against the Normans, even if they weren’t quite the same Normans.

The Normans, in short, was an unexpected ball of fun. It added enormously to my appreciation of the medieval Mediterranean world, even if I don’t quite buy Brownsworth’s hypothesis that the sheer amount of energy the Normans added to Europe transformed its history and helped propel it into global dominance, at least for a few centuries. What is obvious is the Normans’ gift for adaptability: they always took what they had and grafted it on to the existing culture to create systems that not only worked, but flourished. This led to some institutional strength that persisted even if a strong man perished and was succeeded by someone with an inferior skillset. Alas, I think I’m almost done reading Brownsworth unless I can find a copy of his Macedonian book. Perhaps I’ll put a word in with his uncle the indie bookstore shop owner….

The alliance with the Lombards was short lived. Even with Norman arms stiffening their forces, they were crushed by Byzantine forces in the first real clash. The battle was enough to prove the worth of Norman swords to the Byzantines, however, and they immediately hired them to quash the troublesome insurgents. Abandoning the cause of Lombard freedom as easily as they had picked it up, the Normans cheerfully set to work
enforcing the imperial will.

Under the brilliant Macedonian dynasty of Byzantium, the empire had turned the tide against the caliphate and was engaged in a great push to clear the eastern Mediterranean of Muslim pirates. The Macedonian line had ended with the death of Basil the Bulgar-Slayer in 1025, but although the emperors who followed him were weak, the army Basil had created was still formidable and won a string of victories in Syria and along the Anatolian and North African coast.

Charismatic, headstrong, and larger than life in nearly every respect, Maniaces had a reputation as imposing as his physique. Even the usually unflappable members of the imperial court seemed stunned in his presence. After reporting that the general was ten feet tall and had a roar that could frighten whole armies, the imperial historian Michael Psellus concluded by saying that “those who saw him for the first time discovered that every description was an understatement”.

Maniaces gave every sign of panic, assuring the Saracens that at first light he would appear in their camp with every bit of treasure the city possessed. As a gesture of his good intentions, he sent along a large amount of food and drink for the victors to enjoy. The wine in particular had the intended effect as the Saracens were parched and in the mood to celebrate. Before long they were hopelessly drunk and Maniaces’ soldiers slipped into their camp and butchered every last man.

The Crusades are usually thought of as single armies, or single waves of armies, launching themselves in a certain year. However, they were more like continuous movements; not armies so much as armed men moving in ebbs and flows to the East. There was no single route they chose to travel, and no single recognized leader, just a vague agreement of the leading princes to gather at Constantinople.

Andronicus was a curious figure, possessing all of the brilliance of his family with none of its restrain. In 1182 he was already in his sixties but looked two decades younger, and his exploits, both on the battlefield and in the bedroom, were legendary. By the time he marched on Constantinople he had already seduced three cousins, been banished twice, and had acquired a reputation as an innovative — if slightly eccentric — general.

It would have been difficult to pick a more unsuitable group of people to run a government. The three advisers, a eunuch named Peter, a notary named Matthew, and the English archbishop Richard Palmer, spent most of their time trying to assassinate each other.”

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WWW Wednesday

WHAT have you finished reading recently? In Distant Lands, Lars Brownworth

WHAT are you reading now? I just started The Normans: From Raiders to Kings by Lars Brownsworth.

WHAT are you reading next? Perhaps The Devil in the White City, Erik Larson. A coworker has recommended to me on multiple occasions and frequently expresses her disbelief that I’ve not yet read it.

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In Distant Lands

When the Crusades are mentioned today, it is almost always in the context of weary self-flagellation by Westerners searching for some ersatz virtue in denouncing their own history. Forgotten are the Muslim assaults on the Eastern Empire, the conquest of much of Iberia, the invasion of France, and even the attempted attack on Rome. For the modern post-Westerner, there is and can be only one narrative: imperialism! Lars Brownworth offers a far more interesting account—one in which the Western desire to redeem Christian cities from Turkish rule intertwines with Byzantium’s careful efforts to balance quarrelsome allies and uneasy truces with foes like the caliphate, which could not be defeated outright. Despite its brevity, In Distant Lands covers remarkable ground, tracing the course and consequences of each Crusade and showing how often their fate was decided as much by internal politics—among both Christians and Saracens—as by swords on the field.

Brownworth’s previous work into the Normans and Eastern Empire comes in handy here, especially when trying to cover the role played by the East in the crusades. I had previously heard of the Fourth Crusade as a malicious betrayal of Constantinople by the European powers passing through and deciding instead of capture the city: the truth is rather more complicated. From the First Crusade onward, Constantinople was in an unenviable position. While the Franks and Germans coming through with lusty cries of “DEUS VULT!” were brothers in Christ, their arrival would inevitably destabilize the peace the Eastern Empire had established with the Saracen powers who had taken much of the Middle East for Mohammad. Worse: when the Crusaders did make strides, Constantinople viewed this as their being helpful lads and returning the Empire’s cities to Christendom….and itself.

One example of this shows up early, when an increasingly bedraggled Crusader army woke up one morning to find that the city of Nicaea, which they’d been besieging for weeks, had suddenly thrown up Imperial colors. During the night, the caliphate’s forces had withdrawn and allowed Byzantine troops to march in. Now it was a Christian city again, safe within the Empire: no loot for you Franks and Germans, sorry. Time and again, the Empire’s need to act pragmatically toward powers who would still be there after the westerners had gotten bored and gone home would disrupt relations between the armies of Christendom. (The Empire and the Germans had especially terse relations, given that the Holy Roman Empire styled itself as the heir of Rome. Heir of Rome? Rome still exists — in Constantinople, with the real Emperor!) Not that they needed help — every single Crusade was disrupted by internal quarreling, most notably in the Third Crusade between Phillip II and Richard. Fortunately, the Saracens were also often divided, with Sunni and Shiia caliphates fighting amongst themselves, and civil wars happening within the caliphates. Still, as crusade after crusade went on — some under very capable leadership like France’s Louis IX — Europe began losing interest in saving Outremer. It didn’t help that Europe’s princes were more concerned with one another, and that the Pope had lost a lot of moral authority by targeting “crusades” against temporal enemies. By the book’s end, France had essentially captured the Papacy in Avignon, and many of the Middle East’s ancient cities like Antioch and Tyre had been wiped off the map by vengeful Saracens no less destructive than the Mongols.

This is impressive work, distilling a lot of drama and fighting into a volume scarcely more than 200 pages. It gave me a much better appreciation of the Empire’s delicate position during the Crusades, and an appreciate for the fickleness that is fortune: there were so many times when the tide was moving one way or another, only to suddenly break when something random happened. As much as I dislike the Normans, reading this makes me eager to read the last Brownsworth title I’ve not read: The Normans: From Raiders to Kings.

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Teaser Tuesday

“The belief in the inevitability of the past — that whatever happened had to happen — is the great enemy of learning from history.” Lars Brownworth, IN DISTANT LANDS

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Dynasty

The names Caesar and Augustus have been known to me for as long as I can remember,   from the Bible’s Christmas story to early world history texts with colorful illustrations of the Forum. Despite the long history of Rome,  the Augustan family still retains its most colorful characters like Caligula and Nero:   only relatively few emperors since them, like Marcus Aurelius and Constantine, have any name recognition at all for the general public.  Dynasty is a history of this most colorful lineup of men: Caesar, his nephew Octavian (Augustus);   Tiberius,  Caligula, Claudius, and Nero.  Through them we see a slide from the rule of law and moral authority (supposed or otherwise) into military junta and rank decadence.  No stranger to Tom Holland’s pen,  I found Dynasty compelling and informative reading.

Instead of presenting the familiar narrative of a slow, steady erosion from Republic to Empire, Holland lets the men’s lives speak for themselves. We see that the transformation was not gradual at all, but began to lurch dramatically in the last days of Tiberius. Caesar and Augustus both saw themselves as saviors of the old order, which had in fact already partially collapsed during the days of the civil wars between Marius and Sulla, and the unorthodox triumvirate.  Tiberius’ reign appears to mark a crucial point: he was a creature of duty, almost slavishly so. He divorced when told to divorce, he married when Augustus told him to marry, and he looked after several sets of heirs who might one day replace Augustus at the expense of his own happiness and glory.  He was an aristocrat in both the best and worst senses of the word: he shared Marcus Aurelius’s later sense of noblesse oblige, but not his Stoic cosmopolitanism — that regard for all men as fellow creatures. Instead, Tiberius viewed the plebes in a more patronizing way: he would take care of them, but they were unwashed masses who merited no say in government. Despite his attempts to favor the senatorial class and the senate himself, Tiberius was dismayed and angered that the nobles were more than happy to let him carry the full burden of Empire.  Hating Rome and its people, he withdrew like Achilles into his tent,  slipping into his own private decadence and allowing Rome to be led – after his death – by a “viper”.   Caligula and Nero these days are bywords for cruelty and decadence,  and they are bridged by an old man who came to power at the tip of a gladius – not his own, but the praetorian guard.  The guard would become far more active in the political life of Rome after the last subject of this book is dispatched at their hands, leading to the year of four emperors.

The House of Caesar was an extremely dangerous family to be born into, given the pitilessness of Roman politics. Children were hardly safe, either from intrigue or outright murder. They didn’t need to be remotely suspected of being involved in a ruler’s either, either: Caligula’s daughter was murdered immediately after his own assassination purely to get wipe out his family line, and not in a nice way. Brutality is endemic here, even in peacetime with good rulers. Holland does not spare the reader’s sensibilities by shying away from graphic details like the normalization of rape and brutal violence: this is especially apparent with Caligula and Nero, who appeared to worship transgression for its own sake. It gets a bit lurid at times, but made me more appreciative how revolutionary Christianity would be once it swept the Empire — condemning the easy and abusive divorces of the Romans, declaring the humanity of slaves, and asserting a new moral order. Away from the salacious detail, I greatly enjoyed Holland’s writing in general. He appears to have written another work, Pax, that makes this and Rubicon into a trilogy: don’t be surprised to see it in the future, though not immediately.

Quotes

‘Nature produced [Caligula], in my opinion, to demonstrate just how far unlimited vice can go when combined with unlimited power.’

‘These are the objects of my prayers. A plot of land – not so very large. A garden, a spring beside the house, its water ever-flowing, and a small wood on a slope.’as the obituary delivered on him by Seneca, a philosopher who had known him well.

Whether cheering on boxers in back streets, sporting a battered sunhat or roaring with laughter at the sight of a hunchback, Imperator Caesar Augustus retained just a hint of the provincial. None of which did him any harm among the mass of the Roman people. It gratified them to think of the Princeps as a man without airs and graces. Intimate personal details, carefully leaked, helped to cast him as a citizen of honest, simple tastes.

A man as promiscuous as Augustus was reputed to be seemed to many citizens to lack the self-control that was properly the mark of a Roman. Unchecked sexual appetites, while only to be expected in a woman – or, of course, a Greek – were hardly appropriate to a citizen steeled in the noblest traditions of the city. Energies devoted to sleeping around were better suited to serving the glory of the Roman people.

Scolded for not emulating her father’s ostentatious frugality, she only laughed. ‘While he may forget that he is Caesar, I never forget that I am Caesar’s daughter.’

The kingdom of Armenia, a land of icy mountains, thick forests and notoriously effective poisons, lay sandwiched uncomfortably between the rival empires: too indigestible to be swallowed, too tasty to be left alone.

What they adored most of all, however, was the sheer blaze of his glamour. He might be prematurely balding, and possessed of large feet and his father’s spindly legs, yet Caligula knew how to thrill a crowd. The Roman people were bored of grim old men. Now at last they had an emperor who seemed to glory in living the dream. That summer, opening a new temple to Augustus, Caligula rode to the inauguration in a gilded triumphal chariot. Six horses pulled him. ‘This,’ so it was noted, ‘was something wholly cutting edge.’

For decades, secure within its chrysalis, protected by the cunningly crafted hypocrisies of Augustus and the superseded traditions so valued by Tiberius, a monarchy had been pupating; now, with the return of Caligula from war, it was ready to emerge at last, to unfurl its wings, to dazzle the world with its glory. No longer was there to be any place for the pretensions of the Senate – only for the bond between Princeps and people.

As for Caligula himself, he remained on the pontoon; and when he had eaten and drunk enough, he amused himself by treating some of his companions much as he had done his uncle, and pushing them into the sea. Finally, determined that the celebrations not end in anticlimax, he ordered that some of the vessels where his men lay feasting be rammed. And as he watched the action, ‘so his mood was all elation’.

Seneca, when he imagined Roman ships powering their way to as yet undiscovered continents, did not necessarily approve. As a philosopher, he saw nothing to celebrate in perpetual motion. The prosperity that was the mark of a great empire was, in his opinion, a treacherous and soul-destroying thing, characterised by perpetual restlessness, and destined only to torment itself.

‘What an artist perishes with me.’ So Nero, with his customary lack of modesty, had declared as he steeled himself to commit suicide. He had not exaggerated. He had indeed been an artist – he and his predecessors too. Augustus and Tiberius, Caligula and Claudius: each, in his own way, had succeeded in fashioning out of his rule of the world a legend that would for ever afterwards mark the House of Caesar as something eerie and more than mortal. Painted in blood and gold, its record would never cease to haunt the Roman people as a thing of mingled wonder and horror. If not necessarily divine, then it had at any rate become immortal.

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