I cannot tell you how many times I read through this book in high school, but it’s the foundation of everything I know about Star Trek’s original production, from the practical effects to the behind the scenes drama. I Am Spock is not entirely about Star Trek – it’s more of a memoir of Nimoy’s life current to 1995 – but Trek, or “Spock”, completely dominates it. As part of this week’s retro-reading, I wanted to revisit it for the first time in many years.
Part of understanding I Am Spock is that Nimoy had written a previous memoir called I Am Not Spock, which covered his early career and gave fans the impression that Nimoy was trying to distance himself from his pointy-eared hobgoblin alter ego. This led to speculation later on, after the details of The Wrath of Khan were revealed, that Nimoy had consented to do the movie only on the promise that Spock be killed off so that Nimoy could move on in his career. That’s not just fan speculation, either: producers thought Nimoy was distancing himself from Spock as early as The Motion Picture, when their original script barely included the character at all. That is not the case, Nimoy argues here: a thesis of the memoir is that while Nimoy views himself as more than Spock, he nonetheless accepts that Spock has become a deeply ingrained part of his being. Living in a character’s skin for so long – fighting for that character’s integrity, in fact, doing more of the character’s development than the writers did – had permanently altered Nimoy’s own being.
Nimoy realized he wanted to be an actor fairly early in life, being a shy and awkward boy who found relief from social awkwardness in disappearing behind a role and making it his own. He began as a disfigured young boxer in Kid Monk Baroni, then began appearing on The Lieutenant and making a useful contact: Gene Roddenberry. Roddenberry was then working on a pilot for a new show, and wondered if Nimoy might be interested. I never fail to delight in learning about the production aspects of shows like Star Trek that I love, and I Am Spock is full of interesting ones – from Roddenberry thinking that Spock should sound as if he learned English from cassette tapes (hence the slightly English intonation Spock sometimes had early on) to screen tests with “alien” skins (a red Spock looked horrible on black and white sets) and Nimoy’s increasing arguments with writers as he began grokking the character. (Fun fact: Spock quickly became so loved that bumper stickers saying “I GROK SPOCK” became a thing.)
The memoir covers the entirety of TOS’s original run, including Nimoy’s bewilderment that the show, and his character, could become so popular; at first he hadn’t even removed his number from the public telephone listings. Nimoy did not fall to pieces when the original five-year-mission ended two seasons too early; instead, he moved on to other work. Acting was a job, after all, not a religion, and he was eager to try more challenging roles and even begin working as a director. But love for Star Trek ballooned in the 1970s as the show hit syndication, and the arrival of Star Wars created pressure for a Trek revival – a movie of its own, and maybe another show. Star Trek: Phase II was interesting to learn about as a kid, especially after seeing how details of it were incorporated into The Motion Picture and later Trek works. Nimoy truly thought Trek had shot its bolt after The Motion Picture– who could want more of that highbrow bloat, the promiscuous tracking shots? Where was the movement, the fun? Still, though, the explosion of fan conventions and the persistent interest in more Trek gradually made Nimoy aware that Spock was going to be inescapable for him. Star Trek was penetrating the culture, with magazine ads saying stuff like ‘to boldly go’, and billboard ads boasting his image – and his ears! – in a very suggestive Heineken ad. Star Trek was far from done, though: while Nimoy continued working on other projects – film, theater, photography, poetry – Paramount Pictures had made Star Trek its own and wanted to bring Trek back to the big screen. That would lead to Nimoy getting his chance at high-level direction when The Search for Spock became his baby to develop and direct.
Although I’ve read this book so many times over the years that parts of it have been committed to memory, I really enjoyed settling in again. The story is one I enjoy revisiting, in part because Nimoy was such a serious performer and then director – but his ongoing dialogue with Spock adds enormously to the memoir. It’s punctuated with literal discussions between Nimoy and his alter-ego on what he and Star Trek are going through, and these conversations can range from simply funny to downright poignant. Nimoy’s interactions with other people, too, are rewarding to read about – from his impassioned debates with writers over how Spock would react to this or that, to his brotherly rivalry with Bill Shatner which would result in constant pranking and fooling around on set. This would continue even when Nimoy was directing Shatner, as they’d get into mock-arguments on set, pounding desks and shouting while the camera crew rolled their eyes and waited for the tomfoolery to desist. Nimoy and Isaac Asimov’s exchanges by letter are also amusing; I hadn’t met the dear doctor when I first read this, but now having consumed scores of Asimov titles, it was fun to see him discussing Spock’s attraction to women with Nimoy. All the while, Nimoy’s genuine love for Spock as a character, as an ideal and as a person come through.
One thing this memoir made me think about: Star Trek has survived at least two deaths to date, its execution in early 1969 and its collapse from overmilking in the mid-2000s. Despite Trek’s status in summer 2026 – with no shows in production, only rumors of a movie, and a fanbase divided and exhausted – I don’t think it’s dead yet.
Highly recommended.
Spock: Live long and prosper.
Nimoy: I think I’ve already done the former, Spock. And — in no small part thanks to you — I’ve certainly done the latter.
Related:
I Am Spock, Leonard Nimoy. I didn’t realize, but I re-read and reviewed this on the blog back in 2010. It’s interesting to see how 2010 me and 2026 me notice similar things but have different priorities. (2010 me has a lot less personality as a writer, too, I think.)














